Why the F*** Must I Pay for Change!

I'm not a fan of change.

Well...I guess I'd throw caution to the wind if Derek Jeter knocked on my door with a three-carat diamond ring courtesy of Mr. Harry Winston.

But other than Mr. Jeter asking me to become Mrs. Jeter, I'm not sure there is such a thing as good change.

Note: This is not a political blog. I would never foist my political opinions on the few that do read this thing and I would thank you kindly if you did the same for me. Because we all have opinions (they're a lot like assholes, we all have them). My opinions are deep-rooted in upbringing and experiences and I'm not going to change them. I'm pretty sure you wont' change yours either.

And that's as political as I'm going to get.

So, let's get to the topic of the blog - change and how I must PAY for it! Literally.

First of all, I'd like to offer up a big "fuck you" to the Gatorade people.

Why?

Well, here we go, here's the skinny. I workout six days a week. Everyday I like to take a 1000 ml bottle of Kiwi-Strawberry Propel with me. This bottle can cost about $1.60-1.80 at grocery stores and gas stations. BUT at Walmart, those same 1000 ml bottles cost ONE DOLLAR!

But, oh no! Not anymore!

Propel has redesigned their bottles. I liked the way they looked and was all for the change. But there was something about the bottle I couldn't figure out. Oh right! When I went to get my 1000 ml bottle, IT WASN'T THERE! No, in its place was a 750 ml bottle that costs the same amount as the 1000 ml bottle. Seriously, Gatorade! Seriously Walmart! That little fucking bottle should only be $.75!

But is it? OF COURSE NOT!!!!!!!!

It's a conspiracy.

And what about Cup-of-Soup? Every so often they change their recipe (I have found that there are two different recipes that they use, and yes I LOVE Cup-of-Soup, Thank you very much!) and one of their recipes SUCKS! More bad change! Listen up Cup-of-Soup people - If it aint' broke, don't fix it!

And movies! Its hard to make a good sequel, but its even harder to make a good one if the cast doesn't come back. Examples: Predator 1 and 2, Silence of the Lambs and Hannibal, all the Batman movies before Chris Nolan took over, Terminator 2 and Terminator 3 (Ok, T2 was a GREAT sequel but 3 was missing James Cameron AND Linda Hamilton), I could exhaust this list thinking of all the crappy attempts at Hollywood to make a buck instead of placing something quality out there.

Another change I am not a fan of is Sam's getting rid of their floral shop with all kinds of loose flowers to make your own bouquet with and giving us some crappy stand with pre-made bouquets that are HIDEOUS!

And oh my god, Creed just stole a bag of blood!

Sorry, distracted by The Office (Creed fucking rocks).

Now, I am well aware of that there is a bit of good change out there. Like finding a shitload of quarters in your couch, enough to buy a pizza with or when the seasons change, you get out your winter coat and find an actual BILL in the pocket (True story, found a $20 in my pocket this fall).

If only all change could feel that good...